The Truth (?) Revealed
(A Sonnet on "Research Productivity")
He boasts that he doth search for but
That he, well-trained and quite uniquely skilled,
Can work -- much like a wise, discerning sleuth --
To bare new Facts, with worth from fluff distilled!
But 'neath this puff hides his most steadfast goal
To best the lowly masses as they play
A game wherein to execute one's role
Each must compete through just his résumé.
"To win," clear rules do say, "it must be long;
So publish all you can . . . and learn it's fair
To author empty things -- so too what's wrong!
(As few shall ever read them, who's to care?)"
"And so," he tells himself, " 'tis meet
To pen strong claims that wilt if mixed