Funny Stuff (Chapter 8)

Did you hear about the nonswimming statistician who drowned crossing the river? He thought it was safe to walk across from one bank to the other after hearing that the the stream had an average depth of 3 feet.

How can you tell if the person who just leaves the bathroom is a statistician? That's easy! Just check the p-value.

A man moved all his furniture into a new home, but he hardly ever was seen there. One day, a neighbor saw him at the post office and asked why he didn't spend more time in his new home. "There's a simple answer to your question," replied the man. "I'm staying in a motel across town because (1) I simply love my new BMW and (2) I recently heard a statistician report that most auto accident happen within 8 miles of your home."

A statistician is a person whose lifetime ambition is to be wrong 5% of the time.

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These 4 jokes were not newly written by me. Instead, they were plucked from depositories of statistical humor, edited slightly, and posted here to in an effort to show that there's a lighter side to this supposedly dry discipline. If you'd like to see more "funny stuff" about statistics, click here to enter Gary Ramseyer's wonderful website entitled "First Internet Gallery of Statistics Jokes."

Copyright © 2003 Schuyler W. Huck
All rights reserved.